A few weeks ago, after seeing me struggle with something for quite a prolonged period of time, I was told to begin listing things that I am grateful for each day by someone to whom I cannot tell no: my mother. Almost a year ago, I started a gratitude journal in which I listed something that I was grateful for every day for two consecutive months. However, my lack of ability to complete most goals that I set for myself kicked in and I suddenly stopped recording things. When my mother suggested I begin this again, I was hesitant because my attitude wasn't what it should be and my stubbornness told myself that it wouldn't help my given situation. I didn't pick up where I had left off with listing at least one thing every day but I did begin to mentally note things to be grateful for. Within a short amount of time, my outlook on life and the current events taking place began to become more optimistic. The season helped too as I was continuously reminded to be grateful with Thanksgiving just around the corner.
Through gratitude, the Lord will grace us with His peace and provide us with insight as to why we are faced with the trials in our lives. I am thankful for the many words unknowingly spoken for my benefit, for the many people who unknowingly contribute to my happiness and for the always apparent hand the Lord has in my life that pushes me to become stronger each and every day as He "gently shows me my weakness and then teaches me how to change, just like a Father would."
Experiences are inevitable. Learning from them is an option. Changing because of them is a marvelous opportunity.
11.27.2012
9.20.2012
blessings in disguise
As I anticipate what's to come in the near and distant future, I have been thinking a lot about the past and seeing how each moment (triumph or failure) and how each person has led me to where I am now, which is where I feel I am suppose to be. I remember very vividly one night during my senior year of high school sitting at a restaurant with my parents and not being able to eat my dinner because of my situation at the time. I publicly cried (something I hate doing and something my best friend whom I have known for nine years hadn't even seen me do until just over a month ago) as I explained my frustrations to my parents. I had originally planned on attending Weber State University with hopes of pursuing a career in radiology. However, after a fall out with my best friend at the time that was also planning on attending the university and after receiving a rejection letter to a scholarship opportunity I had applied for, I was reconsidering my decision but I didn't have a second plan. After much thought, I decided to stay at home and begin taking the prerequisite courses for the Radiology Program at SLCC. This decision led me to a biology course that introduced me to a classmate who suggested occupational therapy which brought me to the OTA Program and gave me the opportunity to go to Africa where I gained the strength to make some much needed changes when I returned home that have made me, I'm told, a noticeably happier person. I have realized through all of these things, that that situation I considered to be a trial during my senior year has in fact actually been a glorious blessing in disguise and that most all of the trials I have faced in the past have been blessings in disguise because they have, in one way or another, made me the person I am today. I'm not perfect and I am nowhere near the person I strive to become but I am better than the person I have been in the past.
All of that being said... to be the person you strive to become, change is necessary and that isn't a concept I have always been extremely fond of. Change is hard but as Rafiki says, "Ahh. Change is good." Change is the only way to progress and although it isn't easy, it will be worth it. A few changes have happened in my life recently and I anticipate some more major changes happening shortly. I fear them but I look forward to them because I have learned that temporary trials can later become lasting blessings. All we have to do is put our faith in God and trust that His plans for our life far exceed the circumstances of our day.
All of that being said... to be the person you strive to become, change is necessary and that isn't a concept I have always been extremely fond of. Change is hard but as Rafiki says, "Ahh. Change is good." Change is the only way to progress and although it isn't easy, it will be worth it. A few changes have happened in my life recently and I anticipate some more major changes happening shortly. I fear them but I look forward to them because I have learned that temporary trials can later become lasting blessings. All we have to do is put our faith in God and trust that His plans for our life far exceed the circumstances of our day.
"it feels like God visits everywhere else but lives in Africa"
I have been hesitant to attempt putting the experiences I had in Africa into words because I know that whatever I write will not even begin to do them justice. However, I would like to share most of the journal entries written during my time there as they will probably be the best way to illustrate what taught me the lessons I learned. I say "most" because I cannot share all of those entries due to the fact that the ones not included are simply too personal but I think the ones I have chosen will suffice. Just a quick warning... the entries are pretty lengthy and there are many of them. If you don't want to read them but are still wondering what I learned, check out the last part of this post. That being said, here goes nothing!
July 7th, 2012
"We made it to Mombasa and stayed in the Koins Community Center last night. I woke up on the wrong side of the bunk bed this morning and my mood didn't improve when I cut my finger on the bathroom door and convinced myself that I would get AIDS. However, it became impossible to continue feeling sorry for myself when a large number of African children greeted us with dancing and singing and then led us into the village of Vikolani. Kenya is beautiful. Even the smell of body odor becomes bearable once you meet the people it comes from. Each and every one of them is so welcoming, kind and happy. It's an attitude of enjoying the simple things in life that we should all try to achieve.
Once arriving in Vikolani, the students danced and sang more for us to welcome us into the village. Together we all worked on finishing our mud huts which we will be staying in after tonight. The children who were helping me were completely mesmerized by me. I have never felt so white in my entire life. As we worked, many of them repeated my name over and over again. One of the young girls, Maselina, followed me everywhere repeating, "Jamie, Jamie, Jamie." I have a good feeling about the service I will be able to provide and the change I will make in Kenya. I can also see the change Kenya will make in me.
Today was a very eye-opening day. Going into this, I expected to be helping the people more than they would be helping us. I realize now that I was very wrong to think that. Because we will be staying in mud huts in the village of Vikolani, the villagers had our huts almost completely built. The only thing left to do was fill in the remaining holes with mud. After doing this, about six young girls swarmed around me to clean the mud off of my hands. I was so shocked at how willing these children of every age were to assist in building the huts for us and how welcoming each of them was. I will never forget how unworthy I felt as the girls cleaned my hands but also the admiration that I had for them at that time. I only hope to obtain a portion of the nurturing skills that each one of them is naturally born with. Even the smallest bit of those skills would be so much greater than most can imagine."
July 8th, 2012
"It's a beautiful Sunday morning here in the city of Mombasa. The ride from the village feels a lot like being on the ride Indiana Jones at Disneyland. We are attending church at the Changamwe Branch this morning. The opening hymn sung was "Count Your Blessings". I can't think of a more appropriate song to sing this morning. Being here and seeing how these people live makes my gratitude for the life I have been given grow exponentially. I am so grateful for all of the blessings the Lord has given me. Everything here seems somewhat surreal. It's hard for me to grasp the reality that these people live in these conditions 365 days a year. I am just worried about surviving the next two weeks. Despite the lack of clean water, shoes, and other simple necessities, the people here are the happiest and most hard working people I have ever met - two qualities I hope to be able to improve throughout this experience. The closing hymn today will be "There Is Sunshine in My Soul Today". What a true statement. Thinking of you, Craigers."
July 9th, 2012
"Last night after returning from church and shopping in the city, we were greeted once again by the children with singing and dancing, welcoming us as we moved into their village. Maselina held my hand and walked with me until we arrived. They treat us like we are famous. When the girls swarm around me I feel a little bit like a Disney Princess or something. I notice them watching my every move and I realize that my example could possibly have the greatest effect on them as opposed to anything else I do. Although feeling so welcomed and loved already, I realize that this is going to be hard. Last night was a little bit rough. Lying in my hammock in our mud hut under the big, starry African sky, a few tears rolled down my cheeks. I'm homesick and tired and completely out of my element and then I realized how foolish I was being. I noticed that in the whole time I have been here, out of all the African children I have seen, only one of them cried. At that moment, I stopped telling the Lord how many things were getting me down and started thanking him for how many things lift me up every day.
This morning we helped the women fetch water from the pond and carry it to people in the village who were too ill to fetch it themselves. These women carry the buckets full of water on top of their heads with ease. I thought at many times that the water I was carrying would fall from my head and I would have to start over. The work these women do is unbelievable. They start at the crack of dawn and don't stop until the day is done. These people, in my opinion, are some of the greatest people God has created. I'm looking for Him in them and He is not hard to find at all. They've got all of the qualities we deem as Christ like... Qualities God wants all of us to obtain.
After performing daily chores with the locals, (milking goats, vaccinating turkeys, planting trees, etc.) I admire even more so the work these people do. I can't imagine doing activities like those every day. Looking out at the starry clear sky, I'm thinking of how it relates to life right now. The stars are bright and clear and closer than I've ever seen them. There is no electricity so they are easier to see. At home, city lights make the stars less noticeable. When you are in this place, everything becomes clearer. The simple things are the best things and it is easier to forget the things of the world and focus on people - children of God. At home I have responsibilities, commitments and duties. Here, I have them as well but they pertain completely to serving others as opposed to doing something for myself. When I am here I feel like I'm in God's hands, giving myself to Him to use for physical and spiritual service. I'm finding Him in each of them and I'm hoping that they will see the Light of Christ when they look at me."
July 10, 2012
"Today we spent the day in Bofu teaching at the school. My group and I taught the water cycle to an eighth grade class. Following our lesson, we opened it up for any questions that the kids had. Many of them asked questions about America and we taught them a little bit about our lifestyle. Following that, one boy asked a final question. He said, "If the lifestyle is so great in America, why did you come here?"
On our way home, we passed a house with words painted on the door that said, "Look at your life. Don't look at mine." I came here expecting to make a difference in their lives and to try to make them better. Although this is happening, it is important to also look at my own life. This whole expedition would be a waste if it didn't inspire me to love the life I live and to make changes within myself to become a better person. If I don't take what I learn from the experiences I have had and will still have, it will be all for nothing."
July 14th, 2012
(After returning from the safari) "We are back home in our mud huts. It's raining in Africa and it feels like a good time to share some thoughts. Last night we stayed in an extremely nice hotel complete with beds, toilets, running water and a buffet. After staying in a hut with only hammocks and a dirt floor, you would assume that staying in the hotel would have felt incredible. I was very grateful for the luxuries provided but at the same time I felt somewhat spoiled and undeserving. After seeing the conditions in which the people of Vikolani live in, I realize that things I used to consider necessities are not necessities at all but merely privileges. All of the added things we have are simply blessings that most of us take for granted. We have an old sheet hanging in our mud hut for the purpose of writing things at home that we have gained an appreciation for while living here. But as I look at the words on the sheet, I'm seeing how many of those things that we are grateful for are also often times distractions. Things like iPhones and Internet and other electronic devices. They can be used for good but they can also hinder us from doing activities such as serving others or helping those around us. I hope I will remember this. That the things of the world aren't as important as the people you can meet and the experiences you can have without them."
July 15th, 2012
"Last night we were able to use a projector to show a few movie clips to the people in the village. It was very cool to be able to be there with them as they experienced motion picture for the first time. My girls sat in my lap and all around me as we watched. At home I watch movies with my friends all the time. We spend lots of time trying to decide what movie to watch and where to watch it. Here, none of that mattered. We sat on the dirt ground with nothing to complain about except that the night had to end. The simplicity of everything here makes life enjoyable and easy. The people don't focus on what is going wrong or how things could be better. They are grateful for what they have and enjoy the small things in life. They are happy, truly happy. There is a phrase heard often here that is somewhat like "hakuna matata". "Sawa, sawa." It means, "It's all good." Life is good."
I woke up with a head cold this morning so I'm not feeling too great this afternoon. I'll be okay though. This morning we were able to attend a Christian sermon at Mnyenzeni Secondary School. I had never been to a church service that wasn't an LDS one so I was very excited to see the similarities and differences. The school classroom held our group as well as the secondary aged girls and the man conducting the service. When we arrived, the girls were singing praises to God. "Praise God", they would say over and over again. The service began by five of the girls sharing their testimonies with us. Some expressed gratitude for the guidance God gives us and others sang. I immediately felt the Spirit. It is the same Spirit I feel at home. It is the Spirit of God. I could feel His presence when I heard them speak and sing. It was then our group's turn to share our testimonies. Today I had the opportunity to stand in front of the young women in that school and the members of my group and tell them of my belief in God and the love He has for each and every one of us. "Praise God", I said. Because the sermon was full of songs, our group was invited to sing as well. We chose to sing "I Am a Child of God", The Spirit of God" and "Nearer My God to Thee" along with a few others. After singing and dancing and praising God, we listened to the man conducting the meeting teach us about love. Before doing so though, he commented on our singing. "They have some type of musical instrument inside their souls," he said. I will never forget how powerful music can be in bringing the Spirit. There is a major communication barrier between us and the Kenyans. But today as we sang, as we worshipped the same God, we realized that we are all children of Him. No matter the color of your skin or the country in which you live, He loves us all with His perfect love. The same love that He showed when He gave his only begotten son for us. In the sermon, we were asked, "What are you willing to give up to prove your love for God?" For us, He gave His son Jesus Christ. What can we give in return? Following the beautiful service, a small group of us were able to gather together at the Koins Community Center to partake of the sacrament. I am so grateful for the worthy young men on this expedition and their willingness to bless the sacrament so that we could renew our covenants with God - to "always remember Him." Perhaps the greatest thing we can give to Him in return."
July 17, 2012
"Yesterday was the first day since I have been here that I didn't write in my journal. Along with the two OT practitioners, I spent the day at the Sean Michels School. The Sean Michels School was built specifically for children with disabilities - kiddos who are very dear to me. In the villages, children who are born with physical or mental disabilities are viewed as bad omens. The school was built to house the children for three months at a time. After that period of time, the children are allowed to go home for one month before returning to the school. The children at the school are truly Heaven sent. What has surprised me most about Africa is the perception most people have of the people here and how distorted that perception is. We assume that because of the poverty and diseases and extremely poor living conditions that the people here are sad but they really aren't. Buffalo, a friend of Baba Bret, explained it like this... The people here are happy, not because of what they have, but because of the knowledge they have that God loves them just as much as anyone else in the world. The Spirit I feel around these people is indescribable. Despite the different beliefs, they all have one thing in common here and that is God. He loves us all the same."
July 18th, 2012
"Yesterday I was able to sit with Maselina at school. She is ten years old and in class four at Vikolani Primary School. The energy and enthusiasm the children here in Africa show in school is so much greater than that of the children in America. Each and every one of them show gratitude for the education they are offered. They appreciate the opportunity to learn and gain knowledge because they understand that it is the key to providing a successful future for themselves. I know that I personally have not always been grateful for the education opportunities I have had. I realize now how lucky I am to be able to receive an education that will provide me with employment opportunities in the future.
This afternoon we have been given a surprise moment of solitude to reflect on this experience. We have been asked to write a personal goal for ourselves, think about how to achieve it, consider obstacles that may get in the way and decide how we will avoid or overcome them. The goal I am setting for myself today is to always remember the people I have met here in Kenya and live my life with them in mind. I have been so blessed in my own life and it would be a complete waste if I were to return home and continue life the way I was living it before coming here. The people have taught me that hard work is the key to prosperity. They have taught me that happiness does not come from things but from people. Finally, they have taught me that gratitude for what we do have makes what we don't have seem very small. I have learned that we are all God's children and that He loves us all the same. He wants us to be happy and to use what He has given us to make others happy. I want to live my life with the experiences I have had here always in my mind. I want to remember the people here each time I eat a meal or go to school or sleep in a warm bed because I know that if I do remember them in every aspect of my life, I will always be grateful for what I have been blessed with. I worry that as time passes I will begin to forget the memories I have of Kenya and the people I have met. I hope that I will always remember the characteristics and qualities they have that I will one day have those same attributes. They are truly Christ like attributes and I believe that is why I feel His Spirit so strongly here. He has been with me every step of the way and has led me to learn some remarkable lessons that I can't wait to share with my friends and family at home."
July 19th, 2012
"Today was our final day in the village of Vikolani. Tomorrow we leave for Mombasa where we will spend the night there before heading for home. Leaving here is bittersweet. When I said goodbye to my friends at home, I cried because I knew I would miss them. Tonight I cried because I will miss the friends I have made here. I wish I could bring Maselina home with me. That girl has grown very dear to me and I wish her all the best in life. I will miss her beautiful smile and addictive laughter.
When I came here, I expected to learn and grow but I never expected to learn so much in such a short amount of time. This morning Maselina's mother stopped by our hut to check on me. Maselina had told her mother that I had been sick and she wanted to see how I was doing. The thoughtfulness and care that the people here have is remarkable. I have learned that concern for one another is one of the greatest qualities a person can have. If we don't care for each other, who will?
I can't put into words how I feel about the past two weeks. The experiences I have had will define who I am for the rest of my life. The people I have met will serve as role models for me and I will never forget the lessons I have learned from each one of them. The Duruma name that I was given is Bayou which means seed. I was told that without the seed, nothing can grow. The growth that has occurred within me over the past two and a half weeks is more than I could have ever imagined. I am eternally grateful for the opportunity to come to Kenya and I will always cherish the memories I have made of this beautiful place."
July 20th, 2012
"This morning we awoke from the last sleep in our hammocks and packed our things. There were some left over school supplies to take to Vikolani Primary School for donation so I offered to drop them off hoping to say goodbye to Maselina and Kupha. The principal of their school told them that they could walk Lisa, Natalie and I to the KCC if they returned to class immediately after. As we walked, I noticed my head pointing downward in order to see the road and avoid stumbling or tripping over the dirt and rocks. I realized at that moment that I was missing out on one last chance to see the village. If we are constantly focused on what is right in front of our faces, we truly miss out on everything surrounding that. It has been so refreshing to step away from the life I have at home for a bit and step into the lives of these Kenyan people. It amazes me how different circumstances can be under the same sky.
We are at an extremely nice hotel just a short distance from the village of Vikolani where the people live in mud huts with dirty water and unimaginable trials to face every single day. I can't help but feel spoiled as I sit in what feels like paradise. I wish that I could do more for them than what has been done. I wish that I could provide a way for each one of them to earn an education and obtain a job that could ensure a better lifestyle than the one they are forced to live. I have never had to say goodbye to someone knowing that I would probably never see them again. It's a very difficult thing to do. I'm missing them already. I just keep wondering "why?" Why was I blessed with such a wonderful life and why are these people who seem so much greater than me forced to live in these conditions. I guess I will never really know that answer, not for awhile at least, but I think maybe part of that reason is to remind me how truly blessed I am, to teach me the importance of hard work and education and to inspire me to share what I have learned with everyone I know."
I learned that the best hand is the helping hand.
I learned that being happy is a choice that is not at all dependent on what you have been given and that gratitude makes what we have been given enough.
I learned that sometimes the simple things in life are the best things in life.
I learned that change must begin within ourselves.
I learned that people and experiences always overrule material things.
I learned that God is the same no matter where life takes us and that His Spirit can be felt wherever we go.
I learned that God loves each and every one of us the same, despite our circumstances.
I learned that we are given specific people in our lives to teach us lessons that will make us better than we are today.
I learned that love for another is the greatest gift that we can offer.
Finally, I learned that sharing what inspires us to do good with others can inspire them to do good as well, which will lead to a better tomorrow for everyone.
July 7th, 2012
"We made it to Mombasa and stayed in the Koins Community Center last night. I woke up on the wrong side of the bunk bed this morning and my mood didn't improve when I cut my finger on the bathroom door and convinced myself that I would get AIDS. However, it became impossible to continue feeling sorry for myself when a large number of African children greeted us with dancing and singing and then led us into the village of Vikolani. Kenya is beautiful. Even the smell of body odor becomes bearable once you meet the people it comes from. Each and every one of them is so welcoming, kind and happy. It's an attitude of enjoying the simple things in life that we should all try to achieve.
Once arriving in Vikolani, the students danced and sang more for us to welcome us into the village. Together we all worked on finishing our mud huts which we will be staying in after tonight. The children who were helping me were completely mesmerized by me. I have never felt so white in my entire life. As we worked, many of them repeated my name over and over again. One of the young girls, Maselina, followed me everywhere repeating, "Jamie, Jamie, Jamie." I have a good feeling about the service I will be able to provide and the change I will make in Kenya. I can also see the change Kenya will make in me.
Today was a very eye-opening day. Going into this, I expected to be helping the people more than they would be helping us. I realize now that I was very wrong to think that. Because we will be staying in mud huts in the village of Vikolani, the villagers had our huts almost completely built. The only thing left to do was fill in the remaining holes with mud. After doing this, about six young girls swarmed around me to clean the mud off of my hands. I was so shocked at how willing these children of every age were to assist in building the huts for us and how welcoming each of them was. I will never forget how unworthy I felt as the girls cleaned my hands but also the admiration that I had for them at that time. I only hope to obtain a portion of the nurturing skills that each one of them is naturally born with. Even the smallest bit of those skills would be so much greater than most can imagine."
July 8th, 2012
"It's a beautiful Sunday morning here in the city of Mombasa. The ride from the village feels a lot like being on the ride Indiana Jones at Disneyland. We are attending church at the Changamwe Branch this morning. The opening hymn sung was "Count Your Blessings". I can't think of a more appropriate song to sing this morning. Being here and seeing how these people live makes my gratitude for the life I have been given grow exponentially. I am so grateful for all of the blessings the Lord has given me. Everything here seems somewhat surreal. It's hard for me to grasp the reality that these people live in these conditions 365 days a year. I am just worried about surviving the next two weeks. Despite the lack of clean water, shoes, and other simple necessities, the people here are the happiest and most hard working people I have ever met - two qualities I hope to be able to improve throughout this experience. The closing hymn today will be "There Is Sunshine in My Soul Today". What a true statement. Thinking of you, Craigers."
July 9th, 2012
"Last night after returning from church and shopping in the city, we were greeted once again by the children with singing and dancing, welcoming us as we moved into their village. Maselina held my hand and walked with me until we arrived. They treat us like we are famous. When the girls swarm around me I feel a little bit like a Disney Princess or something. I notice them watching my every move and I realize that my example could possibly have the greatest effect on them as opposed to anything else I do. Although feeling so welcomed and loved already, I realize that this is going to be hard. Last night was a little bit rough. Lying in my hammock in our mud hut under the big, starry African sky, a few tears rolled down my cheeks. I'm homesick and tired and completely out of my element and then I realized how foolish I was being. I noticed that in the whole time I have been here, out of all the African children I have seen, only one of them cried. At that moment, I stopped telling the Lord how many things were getting me down and started thanking him for how many things lift me up every day.
This morning we helped the women fetch water from the pond and carry it to people in the village who were too ill to fetch it themselves. These women carry the buckets full of water on top of their heads with ease. I thought at many times that the water I was carrying would fall from my head and I would have to start over. The work these women do is unbelievable. They start at the crack of dawn and don't stop until the day is done. These people, in my opinion, are some of the greatest people God has created. I'm looking for Him in them and He is not hard to find at all. They've got all of the qualities we deem as Christ like... Qualities God wants all of us to obtain.
After performing daily chores with the locals, (milking goats, vaccinating turkeys, planting trees, etc.) I admire even more so the work these people do. I can't imagine doing activities like those every day. Looking out at the starry clear sky, I'm thinking of how it relates to life right now. The stars are bright and clear and closer than I've ever seen them. There is no electricity so they are easier to see. At home, city lights make the stars less noticeable. When you are in this place, everything becomes clearer. The simple things are the best things and it is easier to forget the things of the world and focus on people - children of God. At home I have responsibilities, commitments and duties. Here, I have them as well but they pertain completely to serving others as opposed to doing something for myself. When I am here I feel like I'm in God's hands, giving myself to Him to use for physical and spiritual service. I'm finding Him in each of them and I'm hoping that they will see the Light of Christ when they look at me."
July 10, 2012
"Today we spent the day in Bofu teaching at the school. My group and I taught the water cycle to an eighth grade class. Following our lesson, we opened it up for any questions that the kids had. Many of them asked questions about America and we taught them a little bit about our lifestyle. Following that, one boy asked a final question. He said, "If the lifestyle is so great in America, why did you come here?"
On our way home, we passed a house with words painted on the door that said, "Look at your life. Don't look at mine." I came here expecting to make a difference in their lives and to try to make them better. Although this is happening, it is important to also look at my own life. This whole expedition would be a waste if it didn't inspire me to love the life I live and to make changes within myself to become a better person. If I don't take what I learn from the experiences I have had and will still have, it will be all for nothing."
July 14th, 2012
(After returning from the safari) "We are back home in our mud huts. It's raining in Africa and it feels like a good time to share some thoughts. Last night we stayed in an extremely nice hotel complete with beds, toilets, running water and a buffet. After staying in a hut with only hammocks and a dirt floor, you would assume that staying in the hotel would have felt incredible. I was very grateful for the luxuries provided but at the same time I felt somewhat spoiled and undeserving. After seeing the conditions in which the people of Vikolani live in, I realize that things I used to consider necessities are not necessities at all but merely privileges. All of the added things we have are simply blessings that most of us take for granted. We have an old sheet hanging in our mud hut for the purpose of writing things at home that we have gained an appreciation for while living here. But as I look at the words on the sheet, I'm seeing how many of those things that we are grateful for are also often times distractions. Things like iPhones and Internet and other electronic devices. They can be used for good but they can also hinder us from doing activities such as serving others or helping those around us. I hope I will remember this. That the things of the world aren't as important as the people you can meet and the experiences you can have without them."
July 15th, 2012
"Last night we were able to use a projector to show a few movie clips to the people in the village. It was very cool to be able to be there with them as they experienced motion picture for the first time. My girls sat in my lap and all around me as we watched. At home I watch movies with my friends all the time. We spend lots of time trying to decide what movie to watch and where to watch it. Here, none of that mattered. We sat on the dirt ground with nothing to complain about except that the night had to end. The simplicity of everything here makes life enjoyable and easy. The people don't focus on what is going wrong or how things could be better. They are grateful for what they have and enjoy the small things in life. They are happy, truly happy. There is a phrase heard often here that is somewhat like "hakuna matata". "Sawa, sawa." It means, "It's all good." Life is good."
I woke up with a head cold this morning so I'm not feeling too great this afternoon. I'll be okay though. This morning we were able to attend a Christian sermon at Mnyenzeni Secondary School. I had never been to a church service that wasn't an LDS one so I was very excited to see the similarities and differences. The school classroom held our group as well as the secondary aged girls and the man conducting the service. When we arrived, the girls were singing praises to God. "Praise God", they would say over and over again. The service began by five of the girls sharing their testimonies with us. Some expressed gratitude for the guidance God gives us and others sang. I immediately felt the Spirit. It is the same Spirit I feel at home. It is the Spirit of God. I could feel His presence when I heard them speak and sing. It was then our group's turn to share our testimonies. Today I had the opportunity to stand in front of the young women in that school and the members of my group and tell them of my belief in God and the love He has for each and every one of us. "Praise God", I said. Because the sermon was full of songs, our group was invited to sing as well. We chose to sing "I Am a Child of God", The Spirit of God" and "Nearer My God to Thee" along with a few others. After singing and dancing and praising God, we listened to the man conducting the meeting teach us about love. Before doing so though, he commented on our singing. "They have some type of musical instrument inside their souls," he said. I will never forget how powerful music can be in bringing the Spirit. There is a major communication barrier between us and the Kenyans. But today as we sang, as we worshipped the same God, we realized that we are all children of Him. No matter the color of your skin or the country in which you live, He loves us all with His perfect love. The same love that He showed when He gave his only begotten son for us. In the sermon, we were asked, "What are you willing to give up to prove your love for God?" For us, He gave His son Jesus Christ. What can we give in return? Following the beautiful service, a small group of us were able to gather together at the Koins Community Center to partake of the sacrament. I am so grateful for the worthy young men on this expedition and their willingness to bless the sacrament so that we could renew our covenants with God - to "always remember Him." Perhaps the greatest thing we can give to Him in return."
July 17, 2012
"Yesterday was the first day since I have been here that I didn't write in my journal. Along with the two OT practitioners, I spent the day at the Sean Michels School. The Sean Michels School was built specifically for children with disabilities - kiddos who are very dear to me. In the villages, children who are born with physical or mental disabilities are viewed as bad omens. The school was built to house the children for three months at a time. After that period of time, the children are allowed to go home for one month before returning to the school. The children at the school are truly Heaven sent. What has surprised me most about Africa is the perception most people have of the people here and how distorted that perception is. We assume that because of the poverty and diseases and extremely poor living conditions that the people here are sad but they really aren't. Buffalo, a friend of Baba Bret, explained it like this... The people here are happy, not because of what they have, but because of the knowledge they have that God loves them just as much as anyone else in the world. The Spirit I feel around these people is indescribable. Despite the different beliefs, they all have one thing in common here and that is God. He loves us all the same."
July 18th, 2012
"Yesterday I was able to sit with Maselina at school. She is ten years old and in class four at Vikolani Primary School. The energy and enthusiasm the children here in Africa show in school is so much greater than that of the children in America. Each and every one of them show gratitude for the education they are offered. They appreciate the opportunity to learn and gain knowledge because they understand that it is the key to providing a successful future for themselves. I know that I personally have not always been grateful for the education opportunities I have had. I realize now how lucky I am to be able to receive an education that will provide me with employment opportunities in the future.
This afternoon we have been given a surprise moment of solitude to reflect on this experience. We have been asked to write a personal goal for ourselves, think about how to achieve it, consider obstacles that may get in the way and decide how we will avoid or overcome them. The goal I am setting for myself today is to always remember the people I have met here in Kenya and live my life with them in mind. I have been so blessed in my own life and it would be a complete waste if I were to return home and continue life the way I was living it before coming here. The people have taught me that hard work is the key to prosperity. They have taught me that happiness does not come from things but from people. Finally, they have taught me that gratitude for what we do have makes what we don't have seem very small. I have learned that we are all God's children and that He loves us all the same. He wants us to be happy and to use what He has given us to make others happy. I want to live my life with the experiences I have had here always in my mind. I want to remember the people here each time I eat a meal or go to school or sleep in a warm bed because I know that if I do remember them in every aspect of my life, I will always be grateful for what I have been blessed with. I worry that as time passes I will begin to forget the memories I have of Kenya and the people I have met. I hope that I will always remember the characteristics and qualities they have that I will one day have those same attributes. They are truly Christ like attributes and I believe that is why I feel His Spirit so strongly here. He has been with me every step of the way and has led me to learn some remarkable lessons that I can't wait to share with my friends and family at home."
July 19th, 2012
"Today was our final day in the village of Vikolani. Tomorrow we leave for Mombasa where we will spend the night there before heading for home. Leaving here is bittersweet. When I said goodbye to my friends at home, I cried because I knew I would miss them. Tonight I cried because I will miss the friends I have made here. I wish I could bring Maselina home with me. That girl has grown very dear to me and I wish her all the best in life. I will miss her beautiful smile and addictive laughter.
When I came here, I expected to learn and grow but I never expected to learn so much in such a short amount of time. This morning Maselina's mother stopped by our hut to check on me. Maselina had told her mother that I had been sick and she wanted to see how I was doing. The thoughtfulness and care that the people here have is remarkable. I have learned that concern for one another is one of the greatest qualities a person can have. If we don't care for each other, who will?
I can't put into words how I feel about the past two weeks. The experiences I have had will define who I am for the rest of my life. The people I have met will serve as role models for me and I will never forget the lessons I have learned from each one of them. The Duruma name that I was given is Bayou which means seed. I was told that without the seed, nothing can grow. The growth that has occurred within me over the past two and a half weeks is more than I could have ever imagined. I am eternally grateful for the opportunity to come to Kenya and I will always cherish the memories I have made of this beautiful place."
July 20th, 2012
"This morning we awoke from the last sleep in our hammocks and packed our things. There were some left over school supplies to take to Vikolani Primary School for donation so I offered to drop them off hoping to say goodbye to Maselina and Kupha. The principal of their school told them that they could walk Lisa, Natalie and I to the KCC if they returned to class immediately after. As we walked, I noticed my head pointing downward in order to see the road and avoid stumbling or tripping over the dirt and rocks. I realized at that moment that I was missing out on one last chance to see the village. If we are constantly focused on what is right in front of our faces, we truly miss out on everything surrounding that. It has been so refreshing to step away from the life I have at home for a bit and step into the lives of these Kenyan people. It amazes me how different circumstances can be under the same sky.
We are at an extremely nice hotel just a short distance from the village of Vikolani where the people live in mud huts with dirty water and unimaginable trials to face every single day. I can't help but feel spoiled as I sit in what feels like paradise. I wish that I could do more for them than what has been done. I wish that I could provide a way for each one of them to earn an education and obtain a job that could ensure a better lifestyle than the one they are forced to live. I have never had to say goodbye to someone knowing that I would probably never see them again. It's a very difficult thing to do. I'm missing them already. I just keep wondering "why?" Why was I blessed with such a wonderful life and why are these people who seem so much greater than me forced to live in these conditions. I guess I will never really know that answer, not for awhile at least, but I think maybe part of that reason is to remind me how truly blessed I am, to teach me the importance of hard work and education and to inspire me to share what I have learned with everyone I know."
I learned that the best hand is the helping hand.
I learned that being happy is a choice that is not at all dependent on what you have been given and that gratitude makes what we have been given enough.
I learned that sometimes the simple things in life are the best things in life.
I learned that change must begin within ourselves.
I learned that people and experiences always overrule material things.
I learned that God is the same no matter where life takes us and that His Spirit can be felt wherever we go.
I learned that God loves each and every one of us the same, despite our circumstances.
I learned that we are given specific people in our lives to teach us lessons that will make us better than we are today.
I learned that love for another is the greatest gift that we can offer.
Finally, I learned that sharing what inspires us to do good with others can inspire them to do good as well, which will lead to a better tomorrow for everyone.
8.27.2012
caught in a quick thought
I have a thought that I would like to share just quickly. I saw this question on Pinterest... I know, guilty as charged, but I really like it.
"Is what you're living for worth Christ dying for?"
Maybe if we ask ourselves that question, it will remind us of what is important and help us to focus less on the minute things that seem to distract us from the bigger picture - the picture we all would like to see ourselves in.
P.S. Africa experiences still to come!
"Is what you're living for worth Christ dying for?"
Maybe if we ask ourselves that question, it will remind us of what is important and help us to focus less on the minute things that seem to distract us from the bigger picture - the picture we all would like to see ourselves in.
P.S. Africa experiences still to come!
3.28.2012
"the girl with her period is the one to hang her head"
In poor and underprivileged countries, it is common for girls to receive minimal instruction on what menstruation is and how it can be managed. Discussions concerning this topic are perceived as inappropriate and shameful. Because solutions to this monthly occurrence have not been addressed, schoolgirls in Kenya often suffer consequences such as poor academic performance and more importantly, school absence, which disables a girl to pursue an education or a career. In Kenya, reproductive health issues are the leading cause of dropouts among primary age schoolgirls. Because they do not have resources to properly care for themselves during menstruation, girls will stay home one out of every four weeks to avoid shame and embarrassment. As a result, they receive less education and are more likely to cease going to school completely as they become older. According to www.concernusa.org, "Around 54 percent of out-of-school children are girls, yet studies have shown that women who are educated have greater earning potential, are less vulnerable to HIV infection, have fewer and healthier children, and are more likely to send their own children to school. Providing every mother in sub-Saharan Africa with a secondary education would save the lives of 1.8 million children."
As I stated in my previous blog post, this summer I will be traveling to Kenya through the non-profit organization Koins for Kenya. One of our projects is to build latrines for the Kenyan students near the schools. This will allow the girls to attend school even while they are menstruating because there will be a facility nearby for them to properly care for their symptoms rather than being forced to go to the bathroom in a nearby bush or behind a tree. As a fundraiser, we will be selling necklaces to raise money for the building of these latrines. However, we need YOUR help to do this.
We have been blessed with so many resources that many people around the world do not have the privilege of taking advantage of. We are extremely fortunate to have the option of earning an education if we so choose and so many of us take that for granted, including myself at times. Because of how abundantly I have been blessed, it would be so incredibly selfish not to use the resources I have been given to help improve the lives of others. Something as simple as a latrine may not seem monumental to us but to a Kenyan schoolgirl who has the desire to earn an education so that she can better her life, it will mean the world. If you would like to purchase a necklace or provide a donation, please let me know. Asante sana! (Thank you very much!)
(For more information: http://www.biomedcentral.com/content/pdf/1472-698X-11-7.pdf)
As I stated in my previous blog post, this summer I will be traveling to Kenya through the non-profit organization Koins for Kenya. One of our projects is to build latrines for the Kenyan students near the schools. This will allow the girls to attend school even while they are menstruating because there will be a facility nearby for them to properly care for their symptoms rather than being forced to go to the bathroom in a nearby bush or behind a tree. As a fundraiser, we will be selling necklaces to raise money for the building of these latrines. However, we need YOUR help to do this.
We have been blessed with so many resources that many people around the world do not have the privilege of taking advantage of. We are extremely fortunate to have the option of earning an education if we so choose and so many of us take that for granted, including myself at times. Because of how abundantly I have been blessed, it would be so incredibly selfish not to use the resources I have been given to help improve the lives of others. Something as simple as a latrine may not seem monumental to us but to a Kenyan schoolgirl who has the desire to earn an education so that she can better her life, it will mean the world. If you would like to purchase a necklace or provide a donation, please let me know. Asante sana! (Thank you very much!)
(For more information: http://www.biomedcentral.com/content/pdf/1472-698X-11-7.pdf)
3.07.2012
we are tested, but never abandoned
I apologize in advance for what I think will be the content of my blog over the next few months. I have recently realized that I actually enjoy reading and in preparation for Africa this summer, I have a long booklist to complete. Oh yes, I am going to Africa! This coming July I will be going to Kenya for a few weeks which will fulfill my spring semester Level I Fieldwork requirement. We are planning some amazing service projects for the people of Kenya and I can't wait to get involved in helping to make a difference in their lives.
In preparation for Africa, the first book that I read was written by Immaculee Ilibagiza, a survivor of the Rwanda genocide of 1994. In her autobiography, Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust, Immaculee tells the story of how the death of Rwandan's Hutu President sparked a three-month slaughter of nearly one million Tutsis. As a 22 year old Tutsi during this time, Immaculee was forced to hide in a Hutu pastor's bathroom with seven other Tutsi women for 91 days. During these terrifying three months, Immaculee relied on the power of prayer and God's saving grace to help her survive. Throughout the book, she shares her "aha moments" as she realizes that her battle to survive this war would have to be fought inside of her. At times, Immaculee was given personal revelation that she was being saved for an unknown reason which she later would find was to become "living proof of the power of prayer and positive thinking, which really are almost the same thing. God is the source of all positive energy, and prayer is the best way to tap in to His power."
Although desperately wanting to know why she was forced to go through this during the hardest moments, she says, "I came to learn that God never shows us something we aren't ready to understand. Instead, He lets us see what we need to see, when we need to see it. He'll wait until our eyes and hearts are open to Him, and then when we're ready, He will plant our feet on the path that's best for us...but it's up to us to do the walking." As humans in this life, there are so many things that are beyond our understanding. We ask God "why?" hoping that He will give us an explanation for every trial we are put through. We must realize that in hard times we are tested, but never abandoned. God gives us trials so that we can become stronger and although at times it seems impossible to know how something so hard is helping us, He is there to provide us those answers when we are ready for them. However, "it is up to us to do the walking." It is up to us to have faith in the future and trust in the Lord in all things, and if we do, we are sure to be led somewhere great.
In preparation for Africa, the first book that I read was written by Immaculee Ilibagiza, a survivor of the Rwanda genocide of 1994. In her autobiography, Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust, Immaculee tells the story of how the death of Rwandan's Hutu President sparked a three-month slaughter of nearly one million Tutsis. As a 22 year old Tutsi during this time, Immaculee was forced to hide in a Hutu pastor's bathroom with seven other Tutsi women for 91 days. During these terrifying three months, Immaculee relied on the power of prayer and God's saving grace to help her survive. Throughout the book, she shares her "aha moments" as she realizes that her battle to survive this war would have to be fought inside of her. At times, Immaculee was given personal revelation that she was being saved for an unknown reason which she later would find was to become "living proof of the power of prayer and positive thinking, which really are almost the same thing. God is the source of all positive energy, and prayer is the best way to tap in to His power."
Although desperately wanting to know why she was forced to go through this during the hardest moments, she says, "I came to learn that God never shows us something we aren't ready to understand. Instead, He lets us see what we need to see, when we need to see it. He'll wait until our eyes and hearts are open to Him, and then when we're ready, He will plant our feet on the path that's best for us...but it's up to us to do the walking." As humans in this life, there are so many things that are beyond our understanding. We ask God "why?" hoping that He will give us an explanation for every trial we are put through. We must realize that in hard times we are tested, but never abandoned. God gives us trials so that we can become stronger and although at times it seems impossible to know how something so hard is helping us, He is there to provide us those answers when we are ready for them. However, "it is up to us to do the walking." It is up to us to have faith in the future and trust in the Lord in all things, and if we do, we are sure to be led somewhere great.
1.18.2012
words to live by
I came across this passage during an Institute class that I attended most of last semester. I found the goals appropriate for this specific time of year when people are still trying to find something that they can focus on and achieve throughout 2012.
On January 2, 1891, John Andreas Widtsoe, a former member of the twelve apostles, wrote the following:
"As I have come to fully realize; that, I am as weak as all other mortals–perhaps weaker than many; and realizing that happiness in life is only obtained by having a pure heart, a clear conscience; and fearing the Lord and keeping his commandments; also as I realize that happiness in old age consists of reviewing a life devoid from great sins; the gratification of noble desires manfully carried out; and finding that my life up to this time has not been as I should like it to have been: I lay down the following regulations by which I shall try to conduct my life hereafter; to which end may the Lord Almighty, my Creator, help me.
Resolved:
1st. That religion, the science of sciences, be made my chief concernment throughout life.
2nd. That I will daily pray to God in secret.
3rd. That I will daily reflect upon God and his attributes and try to become like him.
4th. That I will receive Light, Wisdom or Knowledge, wherever or however it may be offered.
5th. That I never be ashamed to acknowledge my principles, beliefs and religion when I once become fully convinced of their correctness.
6th. That I never lose one moment of time but improve it.
7th. That I maintain strict temperance in eating and drinking.
8th. That I never do anything that I would not do were it the last hour of my life.
9th. That I daily read the word of God, that I may learn his will and that I may be comforted, strengthened and encouraged by so doing.
10th. That in any narrations I speak nothing but the pure and simple verity.
11th. That I always do that which I think is my duty and for the best good for my fellow beings.
12th. That I live with all my might while I do live, that I may not die a living death.
13th. That I never by word or manner try to force my opinions on others but that I simply state them and offer my arguments against others!
14th. That I seek to overcome the habit of being quick tempered, loud speaking, impatient motions and whatever might offend my fellowmen and hurt me.
15th. That I never for a moment forget my duty towards my mother, she who has made me who I am and who will make what I will become, she who has spent the better portion of her life in my behalf and to whom I owe all the honor, respect, and affection that I can give; also that I always remember my duties toward my brother and all my friends and relations.
16th. That I complete every task which I begin; also that I carefully consider my purpose and its results before taking upon me any duty.
17th. That I always remember that the men and women I meet are my brothers and sisters and that I look to the beam in my own eye before attempting to remove the mote in my fellow’s eye."
I admire the wisdom that John Andreas Widtsoe had when he wrote this at 19 years old. I know personally it would be impossible for me to live by all of these guidelines without frequently slipping up but focusing on even just one of the seventeen is guaranteed to help better ourselves and bring us closer to feeling true happiness. If you are still searching for something to improve on throughout this year, I encourage you to pick one of the above regulations. If we make it a goal to have a pure heart, a clear conscience and fear the Lord and keep his commandments, I believe that mastering the above principles will become so much easier and we will, as a result, obtain happiness in this life.
On January 2, 1891, John Andreas Widtsoe, a former member of the twelve apostles, wrote the following:
"As I have come to fully realize; that, I am as weak as all other mortals–perhaps weaker than many; and realizing that happiness in life is only obtained by having a pure heart, a clear conscience; and fearing the Lord and keeping his commandments; also as I realize that happiness in old age consists of reviewing a life devoid from great sins; the gratification of noble desires manfully carried out; and finding that my life up to this time has not been as I should like it to have been: I lay down the following regulations by which I shall try to conduct my life hereafter; to which end may the Lord Almighty, my Creator, help me.
Resolved:
1st. That religion, the science of sciences, be made my chief concernment throughout life.
2nd. That I will daily pray to God in secret.
3rd. That I will daily reflect upon God and his attributes and try to become like him.
4th. That I will receive Light, Wisdom or Knowledge, wherever or however it may be offered.
5th. That I never be ashamed to acknowledge my principles, beliefs and religion when I once become fully convinced of their correctness.
6th. That I never lose one moment of time but improve it.
7th. That I maintain strict temperance in eating and drinking.
8th. That I never do anything that I would not do were it the last hour of my life.
9th. That I daily read the word of God, that I may learn his will and that I may be comforted, strengthened and encouraged by so doing.
10th. That in any narrations I speak nothing but the pure and simple verity.
11th. That I always do that which I think is my duty and for the best good for my fellow beings.
12th. That I live with all my might while I do live, that I may not die a living death.
13th. That I never by word or manner try to force my opinions on others but that I simply state them and offer my arguments against others!
14th. That I seek to overcome the habit of being quick tempered, loud speaking, impatient motions and whatever might offend my fellowmen and hurt me.
15th. That I never for a moment forget my duty towards my mother, she who has made me who I am and who will make what I will become, she who has spent the better portion of her life in my behalf and to whom I owe all the honor, respect, and affection that I can give; also that I always remember my duties toward my brother and all my friends and relations.
16th. That I complete every task which I begin; also that I carefully consider my purpose and its results before taking upon me any duty.
17th. That I always remember that the men and women I meet are my brothers and sisters and that I look to the beam in my own eye before attempting to remove the mote in my fellow’s eye."
I admire the wisdom that John Andreas Widtsoe had when he wrote this at 19 years old. I know personally it would be impossible for me to live by all of these guidelines without frequently slipping up but focusing on even just one of the seventeen is guaranteed to help better ourselves and bring us closer to feeling true happiness. If you are still searching for something to improve on throughout this year, I encourage you to pick one of the above regulations. If we make it a goal to have a pure heart, a clear conscience and fear the Lord and keep his commandments, I believe that mastering the above principles will become so much easier and we will, as a result, obtain happiness in this life.
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